017. Self Care and Compassion

 You must connect with yourself.

Do you ever feel that you get swept up by your whirlwind life? It may feel overwhelming to accomplish the daily tasks of paying bills, attending school, meeting deadlines, spending time with your partner, friends and/or kids, completing chores and going to work. It isn't a surprise that many fail to take time for themselves. Also, it shouldn't be a surprise that there are times that we feel like to just want to get away or feel agitated by those same daily tasks. Our mom always says, "If it's everyone else, it's probably you." Meaning, if others in your life or things that you do daily, suddenly start to annoy you, then it's time to take time for yourself.

"If you aren't good at loving yourself, you will have a difficult time loving anyone, since you'll resent the time and energy you give another person that you aren't even giving to yourself." ~Barbara De Angelis 

We would like to introduce self-care. Taking time for yourself is essential in life. Self-care can be anything that you do for you. It can range from taking a bubble bath, listening to music or exercising. Our jobs can cause us to feel overwhelmed. For instance, if you work at a job dealing with others' trauma it can feel like too much at times. Ashley Solis says:

Self-care. Prior to working at the Domestic Violence Shelter, I had never heard this term. I mean, I understood what it meant to take time for myself and to do things that I enjoyed. What I didn't understand was how draining it could be to work directly with clients who have experienced trauma and now need a lot of guidance and compassion.

Self compassion must happen first in order to be compassionate with others.

I was working with a client who was having a hard time practicing self-care. My boss suggested that the client schedule 3 self-care activities each day. I then asked if that's a general suggestion for all individuals. I responded, "Well, I guess I should make that my new goal."

Self-care is essential to living a happy and stable life. It is important to fulfill your personal need for relaxation and self love. It is necessary to perform activities for yourself and sometimes by yourself. While many of us are blessed with loving people in our lives, it is important we take care of ourselves first and foremost.

In true Change Weekly style, we want to propose some of our favorite self-care tips.

Get to steppin’ 

Walk alone, walk with a friend, walk your dogs, walk your neighbor’s dogs . . . whatever it takes to get you to open your front door and go explore the neighborhood. Breathe in some of that cool fresh air and chances are you’ll end up rediscovering the streets you’ve lived on for years. "The British Journal of Sports Medicine found that walking 30 minutes a day boosted the moods in depressed patients faster than antidepressants. Why? Walking releases natural pain­killing end­or­phins to the body – one of the emotional benefits of exercise." Take 30 minutes to take a nice walk starting today and discover the small, beautiful details of the streets you drive on daily.

Suds Up

There are few things in this world that feel more satisfying than a warm, bubble bath. Don't be afraid to go all the way and spoil yourself . . . candlelight ambiance, fresh crushed sage in the water, relaxing music, a glass of wine and maybe even a loofah. Whatever it looks like to you, make it happen and pamper yourself. If you're sore from your workout, add in some Epson Salt and it'll help alleviate your sore muscles. You're welcome.

Talk it Up and Get it Out 

The two of us that contribute to this blog and we do a lot of talking. If something rocky is happening in our relationship or we just need to vent, we know we can talk it out to each other. The telephone conversations always start with "I need to vent . . ." because one of us is overwhelmed. By the end of our discussion (which is usually one person going on and on about their feelings), both of us feel more grounded and level-headed than before we got on the phone.

Yoga and Meditation

Either of these practices are a great way to center yourself. Yoga is a great form of exercise and a helps to be present in the moment. Meditation helps us clear our minds and stay calm. Our favorite, local studio is Green Tara.

These are only a few of the ways to decompress and take care of yourself. What are your favorites? We challenge you to start by performing at least one activity a day, and hopefully over time you will be able to perform at least three, or more!